Tuesday Twelve

1.  This little bugger has turned into quite a reader.  I snapped this photo while we were reading a Flat Stanley book, and David was absolutely cracking up.

I so wish there wasn't a glare on H's face!

2.  We went to the Shelbyville Christmas Parade over the weekend.  Where Jack proceeded to dance in the street to every passing band.  And pee in the street, pants around his ankles, when he had to go.  What?!  I snatched that little naked booty up as fast as I could and brought him between the cars.  I think we need to work on where it's acceptable to pee outside and where it's not.  Like, say for instance, at a parade.  Just an example.

3.  We've done some decorating for Christmas.  Did you know I have a nativity obsession?  I love them.  Interesting, since I'm not particularly religious, but I just love them.  I have seven I think.  I seem to get a new one (or new to me, as I've really only ever gotten one *new* one) each year.  Jack is o.b.s.e.s.s.e.d with baby Jesus.  And likes to give him gifts, such as stuffed mushrooms and Indiana Jones.

4.  We went to the Christmas tree lighting in our tiny town on Friday.  It's pot luck.  For the entire town.  Yes, I'm serious.

The boys were really enjoying the candles.  

I was terrified they would set themselves or someone else on fire.

They just wanted to blow them out and relight them.

123098324102983741 times.

Shortly after that angelic photo was snapped, Santa rolled up.  Pulled in his "sleigh" by a man dressed head to toe in camouflage riding a 4-wheeler.  I'm going out on a limb here, but I'm guessing that the entrance is what prompted David to loudly proclaim, "That Santa's a FAKE!"  Just a guess.  David did sit with Santa to have his photo taken.  And apparently you can purchase them, but I have no idea how or who to contact because it was a random woman with a camera and a little crumpled up yellow piece of paper taking the photos and names.  But no phone numbers.  I have no hopes that I'll ever get the picture.  Santa wanted Jack to sit next to him and David to sit on his knee (seem odd to anyone else?).  David passed on that.  And sat on Jack instead.  I quickly yanked Jack out from underneath David's rear end, while standing on a hay bale that was used to climb up to Santa's "sleigh", and fell through the crack in the hay bales.  Santa watched and said, "Ho, ho!  Your mother seems to have fallen."  WTF Santa?  Give a girl a hand.  David sat next to Santa and said, "This is the first year I've sat with you.  Did you know that?"  Santa said no, like a dumb ass, and David quickly replied, "TOLD YOU!  You're fake."  This whole magic of Christmas business is quickly coming to light with that little smarty.

5.  OK so I love Christmas decorations.  I have up four trees - one in our entry (first photo), one in the playroom (second photo), one in the guest room (third photo) and one in the living room (no photo).  We have several other smaller potted trees all throughout the house.  We were going to cut our main tree down on Saturday.  I suggested, as we walked out the door, that Chris just call to verify the tree farm is open.  Oh it will be - in 2012.  Just a marketing thought - they may want to include that on their WEBSITE!  Instead, we went to a farm stand and picked a tree.  And David swore we were going to cut it down.  Not sure how he didn't put it together that just a few months ago we purchased ferns from the very spot the Christmas trees were growing through the concrete, but whatever.  So we've put our tree up and Jack has only broken two ornaments.  Not bad since it's only been up for 48 hours.  At this rate there will be none left by December 26th.

6.  We overdosed on Santa this weekend.  We went to Bell Buckle to a pottery place for some paint your own pottery fun.  Clearly, as I brought three boys under the age of 8 into a store where every.single.thing is breakable, I use the "paint your own pottery fun" phrase sarcastically.  Jack, little lothario that he is, macked on the girl who works there the entire time we were there.  He asked her to bring him to go potty.  Um, not happening.  When we left he had to "just tell her one more important fing."  He turned around, stuck his head in the door, and yelled, "I LOVE YOU!"

7.  After pottery, we chased all of our children as they ran in different directions, acting like they never go out in public and it was the first time they ever saw anything outside of the walls of their home and I wondered why the hell I don't force them all into some sort of enormous triple stroller that I push while drinking Jack Daniels from a flask I hide in my coat strolled around Bell Buckle and enjoyed the old fashioned Christmas.

There were carolers.  And David asked, not quietly, WHY ARE THEY DRESSED LIKE THAT?!  They were really great, and Jack sang along.

We took a carriage ride driven by Santa and his horse.  

David looks thrilled to be with me.

8.  I have two more Christmas gifts to purchase.  And lots to wrap.  We have literally three closets, and nowhere to store Christmas presents.  Please don't steal my car, because you will steal my children's Christmas.  Each of the gifts that is not wrapped, which is all of them but 1 - let's be honest, is in the trunk of my car.  Every night I'm going to wrap them. . . 

9.  My office does limited work hours for the support staff during the two weeks of Christmas and New Year's.  Because let's be honest - not many people file for divorce the week before Christmas.  I *have* to work two days.  I plan to work more because I want to finish year end stuff just in case we travel to Katie's country in January.  One of the days I have to work?  Like literally have to because the other girls will be out of town?  They day of the breakfast with Santa at school.  Sometimes I hate being a grown up.

10.  Speaking of work, I am so, so stressed about it right now.  Finishing the year end stuff, reconciling all of the accounts, finishing up my book keeping, getting things taken care of with limited available court days - it stresses me out to the max.  Like, as in I've been up since 1:00 this morning stress.

11.  I'm trying a Key Lime Pie cupcake recipe for Friday.  They were the cupcakes requested by my boss for his birthday.  I am excited to try them - I think they'll be great.

12.  Our dossier has been sent to Katie's country for translation!  YAHOO!  Don't get too excited.  It will probably be at least another two months before we go to see her.  :(

Have a great Tuesday!